glorious.

“God will only give you what you would have asked for if you knew everything he knows” 
― Timothy Keller

there have been countless times when i prayed very faithfully for certain situations and circumstances that never panned out the way i had wishfully anticipated. in retrospect, i usually just chalked it up to not being in God's will or bad timing. plus, i'm typically pretty good about getting over disappointment quickly and moving on so it's always worked in my favor, i suppose. for me it's far and few between that i will pray so specifically for something that is completely out of my control, stocked full of minor details and even exact dialogue. but like i mentioned in my post "praying your tears" there was a request i just couldn't shake off. after about a year of wrestling with the Lord, and right before the new year, He answered precisely everything i asked for. i was always afraid to tell anyone else the extent of my prayers or admit how much hearing just a few simple words would liberate and heal me because i never wanted to give someone else that much power over me. in my mind, i wished for an outcome that seemed impossible. even still, His desire was to be faithful down to the exact timeline and setting that i wanted. within just a few moments i let go of all the offenses and years of hurt and anger making room for so much peace and restoration. it wasn't even hard, to be totally honest. it just happened so effortlessly. this was worth the risk and waiting patiently for & i'm so glad i didn't forcefully attempt to vindicate myself based on my own limited strength. even now, i feel almost selfish and embarrassed to realize i got everything i prayed so long for and i can't stop telling God, "thank You. so much." words fall so short but they have the power to make a world of difference. i guess this was His intention all along- to bring more redemption and freedom than i dared to hope for, even when i was willing to settle for much less. You really are amazing grace. You must have glorious plans for me this year ;)
i am so humbled and so thankful. thank You, once again.

2013 is gonna be wild. it's gonna be great. it's gonna be full of You.